Last Friday, I spoke with Dr. John A. Catanzaro, President and Founder of Health & Wellness Institute. He has been such a blessing to me. Seriously amazed by the ways God has loved me through a doctor who really cares. And, prays. Yes, he prays with me. Pretty awesome! Right?
In our conversation, Dr. John suggested some detailed testing to determine if I have a bacterial infection leading to a neurotoxin production where a byproduct is produced and puts off a toxic reaction. The organisms can travel to the liver and kidneys. This can even lead to migraines and seizure activity. Fascinating!
For those of you who have been walking faithfully alongside me with my health complications, like me sometimes, I'm sure you're asking "what in the world?" "can't they figure this out all ready?". Seizures, migraines, a parasite, malnourishment, candida, gut dysbiosis, kidney infection, chronically infected gall bladder...when is it going to end? What's the answer to all of this?
While there have been many discoveries along the way, I still don't have an "answer". But, I have a new direction. And,
I'm daring to live without answers-because God gives me His hand.
It's been a lonnng journey. Almost three years now of physical suffering. Coming from the eternal optimist and girl who hardly takes the rose colored glasses off, I'll tell ya, it's been so hard. really hard. oh the times I've so badly wanted to scream or just break down and cry my heart out. I have done that. But, It's a rare occurrence. Truthfully, I probably should a little more. Isn't that apart of walking through the fire and not around it? We have to feel it. The times that I have cried out to God, He meets me right there.
Right there in that broken place, God gives me His hand.
Through a friend, who randomly decides to stop by with dinner and flowers.
On a morning when I'm hurting, face down in my bible asking God for an answer, and silence. complete silence. He comforts me through my husband. I ask for an answer. He gives me His hand. Later, we walk into a sermon to a woman sharing her testimony of when the doctors told her she wasn't going to live, the complications she's faced and the miraculous healing God has done. Then, the message continued Ephesians 3:1-13 "enduring affliction". Great sermon, if you're interested, check out the link below.
http://marshill.com/media/who-do-you-think-you-are/i-am-afflicted.
I knew it was coming. I knew the answer was coming. Wait for it... "do not loose heart". Exactly what I needed to hear.
A night when I randomly reading 2 Corinthians and God speaks to me through Paul's writings about His thorn, how he pleaded with the Lord three times that the thorn would leave him and, Jesus says:
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Like Paul, I have a thorn. And, like Paul, I have learned to boast all the more gladly of my weakness, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. His grace is sufficient for me, for His power is made perfect in weakness.
A time when I ask God what scripture to turn to, He tells me Job. Again, I see that God is sovereign. I trust His goodness. He is my rock and delight. My joy is everlasting in Him, despite circumstances. And, My faith is indestructible in tribulation!
You see - with God, nothing is wasted. For that, I'm thankful. For His sacrifice, I'm thankful. For the hope of eternity, I'm thankful. For the everlasting JOY in a loving Father, despite circumstances, I'm thankful. For knowing that He, is always with me and will never forsake me, I'm thankful. For the hope that He will heal me, I'm thankful.
I will not loose heart. I will not stop praying for healing without ceasing.
And, I will dare to live without answers - because God gives me His hand.
